Fear and Desire

I grew up in christian school. There I was made to memorize scripture. The first scripture that comes to mind is Proverbs 3:5-6 which says "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths."

I've known this scripture, left it hidden in my heart for nearly 20 years. Yet I still forget about it.

Another scripture that has always brought me much comfort is Psalm 27:1-3 "The Lord is my light and salvation, whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked advance against me to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall.Though an army besiege me,my heart will not fear; though war break out against me,even then I will be confident."

So often I have these great desires to do BIG things for God. However, as soon as my thought is birthed, a fear of failure creeps in and tries to rob me of the idea before it becomes a vision. Honestly, I am tired of it. In order to succeed and do well a certain amount of sacrifice is required, and this is the very essence of worship. Sacrifice.

Recently this verse has been resonating in my mind. It is found just below the passage I previously mentioned. Psalm 27:4 "One thing I ask from the LORD,this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,to gaze on the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple."

I am so tired of falling short because of fear. I'm growing stagnant, and I need to move. My heart is saying "Seek His face." And my soul is screaming, "Your face, Lord, will I seek." I know that if I do just that, trust in HIM, and allow the my Light and Salvation to take utter control in my life, that the barriers of fear in my life will cease.

I want to worship the Lord in total abandon, and will sacrifice what I must to obtain this.